I HAVE BEEN A SINGLE PARENT FOR FIVE YEARS, NOW I WANT TO MOVE ON.

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Coping alone with kids has never been an easy one, I believe single parents should be given extra awards because it is not easy being the mummy and being the daddy too. It takes extra strength to pull this  off so in this light I want to say a thumbs up to all single parent out there, we understand your deals and we pray for more strength for you.

You that walked out of his/her life and left her/him to be a single parent well-done ooooo, I understand that some differences can not be settled but try as much as possible to be a part of the kids life, check up on them, send checks to pay some of their bills and plan holidays with them too, they are still a part of you, you know. Those that walk away and do not look back  well-done ooo, we are watching you on 3D when those children become great and you come to claim relationship, you would get the lashing of your life.

In this light we got the email below in our inbox today.

Black-Woman-Depressed1

I look at myself and I cant believe I’m a mother not to talk of a single parent,with children asking constant questions of where their father is, and why he is not home, But how can i answer this question, when i do not know the answer.

I still do not understand how he just left us, without looking back for over four years now. I have always imagined a home filled with love and care from both parents but here I am being the single parent. I feel so sad like I am giving my kids less than they deserve.

And although I never imagined I’d be a single mother, neither did I imagine I’d be gifted with two loving kids who I love much more than life itself. This is going to be a long ride and it’s not going to be easy, but I hold in my hands two kids who are larger than life itself to me. Promising hope that was lost, real love that I never had, a new life that is just beginning.

What baffles me is, how he hasn’t for once called to ask about the welfare of the children, I do not know what to do. I get advances from other men, but somehow i don’t know if i should keep  waiting for my husband to come back so we can keep living as a happy family or i should move on.

Everytime i want to move on I think of my children and wonder if they would be happy with some one who is not their dad.

Dear Sister,

Its not easy to carry the load of two on your shoulder alone, that must be very much of a load to carry, and with children being who they are they would keep asking questions of how their father is and lots more.

You have to sit them down and explain to them as simply and lovingly as possible, telling them that things didn’t work so well and dad left, please try not to instill the idea of hate or the idea of their father hating them because this might cause a level of inferiority when they stand among other kids as they would keep questioning why their daddy hates them, so please try to make it as plain as possible that it is not about them and that you are there to give them all the love and affection they need. Children would love to hear you speak to them about things and I’m certain your children are not different so talk to them.

After five years and he hasn’t called or tried to take care of the children welfare when do you think he would do this? I think that if you do find someone  who is genuinely willing to love you and your kids then you can move on, but please do ensure that your kids safety is the first thought that comes to your mind, who ever is coming to love you must love your kids too.

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